12-12-09(:

ohh my goshh todayy was a good dayy
blahhhh(: i wish it could happen all over again(:

so basically i went to the mall with myy boo(: omg i loveee him...that was so muchh fun(:

...playing dance dance revolution in the arcade haha(:

mannnn(:

cant you see

he means the world to me
i hope he knows that
i care about him, but its so hard to show that

i dont fall in love easily
'cuss im afraid to get hurt
please understand babe, i love you

i love that thing you do, its nothing really, but that little giggle and that small wave
ohh goshh...it fills my heart so quickly

i dont fall in love easily
'cus im afraid to get hurt
please understand babe, i love you

we dont do what others do
we love like no other
they ask why not kiss, because we dont need to
our love is stronger than touch
stronger than a kiss
its more...
its the hold
the strength
the depth
we are so far in...
itss imposible to come up

he has my heart..wrapped in his hands, tucked away, deep in him
he has my heart...and it is his...i am empty...

he has it all
and I KNOW he wont break it

he knows...

im so deeply in love with you, oh yess(:

lovee the music.

i love to dance
i love the rhythm pumping in my heart
i love the music
the lyrics of love
i love the beat
as it flows through me...
i love the echo, to where my voice cant compare
i love the harmony
i love the tempo
i love it
oh do i love it
its so easy to love music
...so why cant i love you that way?

thiss fwend

soo i have this fwend
and i love her dearly
but she makess so many mistakess, i wonder if she can see things clearly
she has my heart
and i have hers
but damn idk how muchh pain she can keep causingg
i wonder if she knows, how much i care
and how much i think her love is soo sincere
but how can we build our love, if she keeps that wall
of mistakes, and heartache, that all those boys cause
the boys
they hurt, and she knows that so well
but why does she keep goin back just to get hit again
the mistakes, they get higher
and soon idk if i can see her anymore, because her wall gets bigger
and it seems like im gettin shorter
and all i can say is, love me, before you love "them"
love who sees you for you
not the once who just want your body or like your face
love me
because you are MY bestfriend
and that wont change
but boys.........
they alwaysss fade away

thee boyfwend(: continueddd

heyy you guysss(: so yeahh its been foreverrr[haha] since i've been writing..time has gone by so quicklyy i just forgot...anywayss so yeah i still go out with "mr. anonymous" lol...he's so special...itsss been 4 monthsss now(: heehee....yeahhh we spend so much time together...and our familiess. just [click]...idk i never felt so much passion with a boy before. its like everytime i see him...i keep getting so wrapped up in emotion,,i feel likee im going to burst..haha...he makes meee laugh so muchh, its insane...and everytime he looks at me my heart warms...and chillss spill down my back. i have a rush of loveee just everyday...we talk likeee allllll the time, i think we have A.D.D lmao...buttt uhmmm i thinkk we can make it, and i hope we do(: i cant see my life without him anymore(:

i lovee you(:

obama(:

sooo i juss watched the president's speech to us "students"...i knoww, i knoww im pwetty...LATE..but hey(: anywayssss...i thought it was inspiring and i thinkk it was nice that he did that...it re-insures us as students that people still do care about our education...alott of kids have been dropping out...and all i can say is, "i feel sorry for youuu" lol...cuss i mean whats the point?? u going to have to go back anywaysss to get a GED...so u mightt as well just GET through it the first time...i meannn obama does make good sense...

alsoo, i think republicans made a BIG DEAL overrr nothinggg...talking about he was just goin to promote his campaign? like seriously just let the dang mahn speak!...anddd i think racism is comingg back,,,and its coming back QUICKLY...now everybody is trying to bash the president...for what? because he's black???...okay first everybody was trippingg over BUSH cause he screwed up everythinggg...and obama jus got into office and everybody complaining...the man hasnt even done anythingg lol

im really upset that people can be this ignorant...and howw "fake" this country is being...

but one thing i know! is that im not afraid to speak MY mind...and whoever has something to sayy about it thats fine(: i lovee to provee somebodyyy's stupidity(:

the boyfwend(:

well...his nameeee is ??? none'ya business lmao..any-t-ways lol...he's sooo amazinggg and i really likeee him...[uhmmm]...he's tall (well taller than me *of course*) and iss reallyyy special...and has the most amazing voice *ever*! lol uhmmm if he reads this komment pleaseee(:


i really like him and i [think] he likesss me tooo(:

he makes me smile all the time...[he's and awsome possom] lmao

he's funnyyy and sooo easy to talk to(:


[i think we can make it through highskewl(:]

highschool:)

im sorryyy i haven't been on lately. ivee been at skewl(: ohh myyy goshhh i love highschool..its fun and you get alottt of freedom...i just like the whole feeling of being around older peoplee its juss really kewl to me(: well highschool's been awesome [so far]...no drama...jus regular oldd walk in the hall, class, tests, and back home...uhmm the bus?? is pretty crazyy...older oness cus alot...but i dont complain...lol


its better than walking to skewl(: i havee 3 projects to do soooo i gotta go...adios bloggers(:

ill be back soon(:

..[my 3 stepss to looking goodd]..i think they work

well there are two more dayss...and i will officially be a freshman(: [shocking enough, im nott really that scaredd]...i mean im seeing these others girls panicking over hair, make-up, shoes, clothes...i mean like seriously jus forget about it...like just forget who looks at you...who talks about you...i have me 3 ruless all planned out

1. On the first day,,,while you are starin at yourself in the mirror, instead of looking at your flaws...look att the good sides...compliment them with your clothes...see what makes you stand out yet keeps the simple side of you too...there's no need to kill your face with useless make-up...jus lett your natural side flourish
2. Look in your closest for an outfit that compliments you...if you are more curve-a-shis...where blackkk [it makes you look slimmer]...orr like me where jeans that are a little tight around your thighs and a little loose around the waste...thiss will make you have a little more waist without having to wear thosee extraaa extraaa tight jeanss
3. Do your hair simple...less is more...all that wild curls is un-neccessary its just skewl:)...besides what happens a week later when they all fall and u just have a weird wavy hair do lol...:)...i know from experiencee lol...

beforeee you start disagree-ing lol...these ruless are forr me nott you...sooo if you dont agree thats fine:).

couldd i be looking at thiss all wrong?

sooo i've been thinkingg about some thingss lately...and hmmm i think i've been looking in all the wrongg placess for that "guy"...okayy heres the thing

there aree these two amazingg guyss...but in there own wayyy

guy 1:
simple
mmm kinda quiet
nice style
fine [in my opinion]...but other girls mayy see himm more as "cute" or "okay"
andd veryy sensitivee

guy 2:
funnyy
very talkative
not shyy onee bit
well on the flip side...not as fine lol...more like uhhhh "okayyyy"


welll i've been having a crush on guy numero uno...for quite awhile...but uhmmm he doesnt crush back...so wat do i do??...i stop caringg and try to make things as smooth as possible= meaning forget about likingg him and JUST BE FRIENDS...

butt guy 2...i never was interested in...well im still not but theres somethingg different about him


well i guess im stuck with the wholee looks kinda thingg...i mean guy 2 isnt really what im interested in [physically]...but does it matter??

i mean i talk about boys worrying about looks too much....am i doing the same thing??? when im turning a great guy down over just the physical stuff

i dont knoww...but im not going to be a hypocrite...i guess this will be my new motto:

"never feel the outer shell until u reach the enter one"...

wait is that even a good motto lol...i dont knoww it makess sense to me:)

well of course it does i made itt. haha duhhhh

lol

blahhh ;p

one word: shelby! :)

okayy i met this chica...a whileee back...we werent the closest friendss...[more like associates] at the timee..well the school year went by andd we never got to "hang" like we do noww...but idk something changed...

her friends were -->leaving<--...simply over little stuff that most friends just forget about and talk it over...i saw her depressed, and at her lowest momentss..and all i could do was feel sorry for her...

i knew how it felt to be torn apart by your "suppose" to be friendss...well, i guess that's what brought us to our friendship now..

i was there for shelbs...i didnt want her to endd up like me...i didnt have any friends to lean on, in my deepest moments...it was jus me, myself and i..
andd i hated it, i hated those who said they will stay by my side...but were more concerned about losingg there friends than helping a girl who couldnt fend for herself in the timee of war...i was appauled...

...this inspired me...

it inspired mee to understand her pain and what she is going through...i stayed by her side when the whole world walked out...i was there...and i promised her i will always be there, because that's what friends do...the stay by no matter WHAT...

over the course of time we found out we had more things in common than everrr...lol
plenty of insiders
laughing at a peek glance at one another
making fun off those silly boys
andd building a friendship like no other...

but recently, things changedd for a SEC...we lost our bond...thingss changed between uss but instead of giving up we camee back together...and noww we are great again lol


im at her house rite noww actually

her name is jasmine:)

we were shy...never outspoken....the ones in the front of the bus...we didnt get that much attention...but on the "flip" side...we didnt want them...

she is jasmine:)

noo we didnt start off as "bestfriends"...we were different...[and i mean completely]

jasmine:
*long hair*
*light-skinned*
*athletic body*
*nice stlye*
....jasmine had it all...

but me...
kiara:
*short hair*
*darker*
*glasses*
*andd thick*


we were from opposite stereo-typess...she was the onee boys adored..fell over hills for, whould climb mountains for...

mee...i was the onee talked about, criticized, and not seen attractive by most guyss..


hmmm...

sooo how did we get to being bestfriends???...well...

jasmine wasnt like otherss..no not at all...she was sensitive, caring, and didnt judge...she saw me as beautiful...she would tell me time again that i was pretty...but i never took her word...i thought she was juss saying that like i was some "charity" casee...like the smallest off insults..would break me down...and "in fact" it did...i was depressed...i constantley heard that same word days and dayss out from those considered "popular" or "fine"...

"ewww she'ss fat", "she's ugly"....i couldnt understand..why i was gettin so harshly bashed..


but then she came...jasmine saved me from myself...she took me to a place where i could be comfortable with myself and not care about those around me...jasmine helped me so much....and i love her for that [no homo] lol...she is truly my best friend..:)

"i figured out whatt i needed"

i learnedd..

that he wasnt the one...that we were never meantt to be...that a boy cant complete me. and that i am a beautiful girl...andd iff a BOY cant realize that thann maybe itss not my time:)...maybee its not my time to find love, my soul-mate, the one for mee.

i feel likee im the one never choosen...im the onee never seen ass the girlfriendd...moree like the "girlfriend's" friendd..and it hurtss. it hurts because i dont understand what i dontt havee that SHE does...

i will look in the mirror and see this ugly girll that no BOY will ever want...but today, noo not today...noww i see ann amazing girl...that has jus not found what she isss looking for :(

i sit heree and question my "beauty" everyday...
*why isnt my hair longer?
*why do i have to have braces? --->[butt i dont wear them anymore]
*whyy i have to wear glasses?
*whyy my body is perfect?...the way i want it...

i wanted to be flawless. and i hated myself for itt...i hated my friends for being what i wasnt...when i stood by them my body raged with envy from head to toe...they were the ones being "checked out" by boyss...NOT ME...

whyy not me?

:(

okayy so obviouslyy im havin this problemm that bugss me sooo freakin much now adays...okay im soo sick in tired off these boys theyyy jus dont UNDERSTAND...and itss soo stupid..lol likee sometimess i wish they will realize and see who really likes them and who jus usess them. but i cant say anything...i just sit there and watch the boy crumble and get humiliated in front of all his friends over a girl that he considers "fine" and dreams to have...all the while in the girls mind is just another dude who likes me and wants to be with me but will NEVER get the oppurtunity because he isnt -->fly enough, cool enough, popular enough, fine enough<-- itss jus soo stupid...but mee ohhh mee jus beingg me i laugh...i laugh at the incompetance of a foolish boy who is caught up in society drift off the "looks"...and its so contagious now adayss :(....

mmm...boys:)

sooo...here's the thing...there are boysss...

group 1: the sensitive type-the onee that is afraid to make the wrong move and ruin his chances with that onee girl that has lightened his world

group 2: the typical "bad" boy- oh myy goshh these boys dont care who or where they r they will act how they want noo matter whos around

group 3: the lover boy- the one who takes care of the girls one and only needs 24/7, seven days a WEEK lol (and personally my favorite)

anyywayy; the whole point of this bloggg is to ask you why?...why? is it soo hard to find that onee guy whoo is sensitive when u want him to be, act crazy at the right time, and loves u unconditionally...is it that hard to find that "onee" guy...

thesee days i feel like there is no point...no point of soul-searching...noww its more like...they come they goo...and i hate it...i hate how boyss now a days look at that one thing "the LOOKS"...


nowww...
looks are so over exaggerated...

example 1: a girl walks by....long hair, pretty eyes, beautiful body...all the typical stuff...and all u see is boys *killing* to talk to herr....(now before u get this wrong i am not jealous, i jus want to understand why looks is all "most" guys worry about).....

example 2: a girl walks byy....hmmm hair not as long, a simple body not anything to fancy, and has moree of a pretty face...not FLAT OUT GORGEOUS...and guys will look at her and says she's ugly or something like that...


soo the point im tryingg to make is that there are too many boys looking at the "facials"...not every girl will be the prettiest...but i bet that same onee a boy thinks is ugly, will be the same one whoo will love a boy/man with everything she has....i believe this because...a perfect face can find any dude to run too and doesnt really have to love a boy as deeply...but that pretty face a.k.a the onee the boys believe is ugly will be that onee who will care alot about u because she doesnt get "as many boys"...

u mayy not believe this is true...but once again this is MY opinion...andd i feel this way because of my own experiencess with guyss

freshmahnn year!

yess! i amm a freshman:)...im soo readyy to make this yearr a blast...im going to hightower highschool...ummm im soo gladd that im goin to highschool with somee of my bestfriendsss accept onee:(...sooo latelyy i've been "dreaming" about my firstt day. lol...i hope i dontt trip and fall over crap..or runn into an oversizeee football player orrr a very popular person that wouldd be CRAZYYY. lol...;)...butt uhmmm soo far my "dreams" have been [okay]...i dont think anything tooo bad will happen...lol...[thats a lie]...but uhmm i remember last yearr andd i was on the bus with my friend and i had the MOST embarrasing time...like i was really like hyper i guess sooo i kept moving everywhere...it was crazyyy...lol...iff u have some emebarrasing skewl storiess, commmenttt me...lol...class' 2013:)

justt me:)

Kiara:

soo my name is Kiara. im veryy neww to this soo u have to excuse my [boring-ness] lol<--if thatss a word...uhmm im a very interesting and complicated person lol...i want to have it all but when i get it idk wat to do with it [if that makes sense]...i guess it's my adolesence stage lol...anywayysss i am very spoiled lol---> and i jus loveee my parents for that lol. but i try really hard not to be...i guess it comes "naturally"...uhmmm i have somee really AWESOME friends. they r like the coolest most faboulous-est friends in the wholeee wide mundo :D...butt ill tell u about them later...i lovee to bee the best and when im not i guess i gett kinda madd lol...i try to achieve the greatesttt...im finna be a freshman at hightower highschool. and im so ready to take the school by storm lol [after all i am an official hurricane now] lol :)...theres more to comeee but bye for now:).